HINDSIGHT CAPITAL MANAGEMENT
“Where our 20/20 vision only kicks in after your account hits zero.”

To: Hindsight Global Investors
Date: April 24, 2026 at 07:00 PM EDT
Subject: The Holy Wednesday SuperBowl of Degeneracy

Greetings, you beautiful, soon-to-be-liquidated degenerates.

The general market vibe is currently a cocktail of pre-earnings terror and irrational euphoria, served with a side of geopolitical gaslighting. Everyone is hyper-fixated on Wednesday, which is being heralded as the finance bro SuperBowl. With half the S&P 500 reporting, the consensus is that it's going to be a wild freaking day that could end in Armageddon. Whether you’re unemployed and watching the chaos for sport or rage-trading your DoorDash earnings into shorts, remember: the market is a shitcoin and nobody knows what’s going on.

[INTC]: The ghost of Nana is laughing from the great beyond as the stock broke all-time highs. While some are apologizing for doubting the legendary inheritance YOLO, others are shorting it out of pure, unadulterated spite, claiming the company does nothing.

[AMD]: Formerly the "Advanced Money Destroyer," it has rebranded as the Advanced Money Duplicator. One absolute unit is sitting on a $7.7M gain with a $10 cost basis. It's now worth more than Oracle, making the rest of us feel like plebs for holding shares instead of options.

[MSFT]: Sentiment is pumping ahead of earnings, with bulls full porting into LEAPS and calling for $500 EOY. Some analysts (i.e., guys on the internet) say it's oversold and ready to print.

[GOOG]: Alphabet is playing 4D chess by dropping $10B into Anthropic. It’s a circular deal designed to shove money back into Google Cloud, keeping the AI circlejerk alive and well.

[SPY]: The index is currently running on borrowed gas and hopes and dreams. It pumps 2% on fake news about ceasefire talks and ignores drones hitting borders. Truly disgusting price action.

[JPOW]: The DOJ is expected to drop the criminal probe, proving that you simply can't punish our Lord and Savior Jerome Powell. The market celebrated with a 1% pump because uncertainty is for losers.

[RDDT]: Still the king of bagholders. Some are praying for billions on earnings, while others are just praying for survival.

[NVDA]: Semis continue to steamroll anyone brave/stupid enough to buy puts. One investor saw $193k vanish in a day, proving that calling the top is a great way to go broke.

[FIG]: Bullish DD suggests it could be the next 10x due to CEO compensation plans similar to Elon’s, but bears think it’s dead money and that AI design tools will eat its lunch.

[CAR]: One lucky regard turned $115k into $288k with puts, while others are still waiting for a drop that may never come.

[AAPL]: People are going full port into calls, betting the farm on Tim Cook’s ability to sell us the same phone for the 15th year in a row.

[SaaS]: There’s a pile of garbage being pumped by a few whales with $2M portfolios. Skeptics say SaaS is dead thanks to AI, while others are just waiting for the flush.

The market can stay irrational longer than you can remain solvent, especially if you’re falling asleep while holding 0DTEs. If you feel the urge to short a company backed by the government and the 🥭, please reconsider and just donate the money to a Wendy’s manager instead.

See you at the local dumpster,

Hindsight Henry
Chief Investment Officer, Hindsight Capital Management