HINDSIGHT CAPITAL MANAGEMENT
“Yesterday's Gains, Tomorrow's Losses—Guaranteed.”

To: Hindsight Global Investors
Date: January 31, 2026
Subject: The Great Metallic Meltdown and Other Ways to Lose Your Shirt

Fellow Exit Liquidity and Soon-to-be Wendy’s Associates,

The market currently has the structural integrity of a Jenga tower, and we’re all playing with oven mitts. We just watched a 40-trillion-dollar market move like a piece of shit meme coin, mostly because someone nominated a hawkish Fed Chair who thinks Bitcoin is "innovative." While half the sub is scared to check their portfolios, the other half is busy betting the farm on shitty resolution graphics and companies that have hostages instead of customers. It’s officially puts season.

[SLV/GLD]: A total historic puke. Silver dropped 38% in a day, an event unseen since we were little sperms in our dads' ballsacks. CME jacked margins right after the puke candle, and now the 3x leveraged funds are not going to recover. Apparently, "safe havens" involve Chinese trading scams and paper gold scams.

[RDDT]: Degenerates are full porting ahead of earnings. The bulls think it’s too good to pass up and could easily hit $200 again next week if user growth doesn’t suck as much as the ugly earnings graphics.

[MSTR]: Michael Saylor is officially underwater on his BTC stack, and the crypto bros are in crisis mode. Turns out massively diluting shareholders to go all-in on a volatile asset isn't "prudent investing"—it’s just a Ponzi scheme with better memes.

[TSLA]: Elon is the greatest con artist in history, pivoting to robots because car sales flopped. While the cult is all-in on humanoid robots, the bears remind us that their last bot was just a dude dancing in a spandex suit.

[SNDK]: The best pure momentum play right now. With a tiny float and analyst targets at $1,000, it’s moving violently without hype. Of course, half the sub thinks it's overpriced and ready for a rug pull.

[GFS]: This stock is shorted to the gills. Someone loaded the f’king boat on quad-witching volume, and the theory is that NVDA might buy a stake to scale robotics. Even if the tech is outdated, the SRAM heavy AI chips have bulls feeling "shit-tastic."

If your portfolio is currently hemorrhaging, remember: at least you can stare at your shiny stones while your purchasing power vanishes. If everything goes to zero, I’ll see you at the Wendy’s dumpster. And don't bother asking for a refund; stop limits are for pussies.

May your losses be tax-deductible,

Hindsight Henry
Chief Investment Officer, Hindsight Capital Management